Friday, 30 November 2012

Friday Humour - Wallet Scam

Be aware of a scam to steal wallets.  Over the last month I became a victim of a clever Eastern European scam whilst out shopping, and simply dropping into Sainsbury's for a bit of shopping has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your friends. Here's how the scam works:

Two seriously good-looking voluptuous 20-21 year-old girls come over to your car as you are packing your shopping into the boot.  They both start cleaning your windscreens, their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-Shirts.  When  you thank them and offer them a tip, they'll say 'No' and instead ask you for a lift to another supermarket store, in my case Tesco at Hartford. Bridge.

You agree and they both get in the back seat.  On the way they start undressing and both get completely naked.  Then when you pull over to remonstrate  one of them climbs over the front seat and starts crawling all over your lap, kissing you, touching you intimately and thrusting herself against you, while the other one steals your wallet !

I had my wallet stolen on August 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th, again on 17th, 20th, 24th and 29th.  Also on September 1sr, 4th, 6th, 10th, twice yesterday and hopefully again this coming weekend !!

P.S.  Aldi have wallets on sale for £ 1.99 each, but Lidl's are £ 1.75 and look better.

Yeoman Warden At Tower Of London

This is very good :)


The Bacon Tree

Subject: The Bacon Tree  
Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert, wandering aimlessly and close to death. They are close  to just lying down and waiting for the inevitable, when all of a sudden.......
  "Hey Pepe, do  you smell what I smell. Ees bacon I is sure of eet"
  "Si, Luis eet  smells like bacon to meee".
So, with  renewed strength, they struggle up the next sand dune, and there, in the  distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.
There's raw  bacon, dripping with moisture, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double  smoked bacon...every imaginable kind of cured pig meat.
  "Pepe, Pepe, we is saved. "Eees a bacon tree".
  "Luis, are  you sure ees not a meerage? We ees in the Desert don't forget"
  "Pepe when  deed you ever hear of a meerage that smeell like bacon...ees no  meerage, ees a bacon tree".
And with that ....Luis Races towards the tree. he gets to within 5 metres, Pepe following closely behind, when all of a sudden, a machine gun opens  up,and Luis is cut down in his tracks. It is clear he is mortally  wounded but. true friend that he is, he manages to warn Pepe with his dying breath.
  "Pepe...go  back man,you was right ees not a bacon tree"
  "Luis Luis mi amigo...what ees it?
  "Pepe..ees  not a bacon tree...






 Eees a Ham Bush.

Friday, 23 November 2012

Picture Of The Week - No 11 - Photo Finish

From Wargaming BLOG Photos

Male Ecstasy (50 shades of grey)

He was in ecstasy with a huge smile on his face as his wife moved forward, then backwards, forward, then backwards again, back and forth, back and and and out.

Her heart was pounding...her face was flushed...then she moaned, softly at first, then began to groan louder. Finally, totally exhausted, she let out an almighty scream and shouted
."OK, OK! I CAN'T park the f!!!!!! car!  You do it, you SMUG b*stard!"

Thursday, 22 November 2012


Some quite interesting colour photos here of London during the war: Link



I won't comment on the politics of the current dispute between the Israelis and the Palestinians in Gaza, but as someone interested in military hardware this article about the rockets employed makes quite interesting reading.  Link


OK Go - This Too Shall Pass - Rube Goldberg Machine version

Comment:  This very very clever, and is worth watching full screen  :)

Saturday, 17 November 2012

WW II vehicles battle for bids at auction

On December 8th, Auctions America by RM is holding one of the largest ever sales of WW II-era vehicles at the National Military History Center in Auburn, Indiana. Over 80 vehicles will be crossing the block, with all of the proceeds going toward preserving the non-profit museum.

Read more:

 Comment:  I wish had won the lottery, because if I had I'd be buying some of these vehicles !

Thursday, 15 November 2012

Classic Warlord - Board Game

Years ago I played the board game 'Apocalypse', produced at the time by Games Workshop. This is a 4 player strategy game where you nuke the crap out of your opponent, and it's just totally brilliant. After much hunting around for several years I managed to source myself a copy on E-Bay some years back.

Well, it seems that 'Apocalypse' was a smaller version of an older larger game for up to 7 players called 'Warlord' which was originally invented and designed by Mike Hayes. The good news is that a limited 500 game run of Warlord (now named Classic Warlord) is now available to buy, and is something I'm serious considering. Link



T34 Flips Over

Comment:  Ouch !

They're All Around Us

My daughter and I went to the McDonald's drive through check-out window to pay our bill and I gave the clerk a £5 note.

Our total bill was £4.20, so I also handed her a 20 pence piece.

She said, 'You gave me too much money.'

I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me £1 back.'

She sighed and went to get the Manager who asked me to repeat my request.

I did so, and he handed me back the 20 pence and said 'We're sorry but we do not do that kind of thing.'

The clerk then proceeded to give me back 80 pence in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at MacDonald's !!

We had to have the garage door repaired. The GARADOR repairman told us

that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.

I thought for a moment, and said that we had the largest one GARADOR made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.

He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.'

I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two..'

We haven't used Garador repair since. Happened in Moor Park , near Watford .
I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbour call the

Highways Department to request the removal of the 'DEER CROSSING' sign

from our road.

The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars on this stretch of road! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing, any-more.'

Story from Potters Bar, Hertfordshire.

My daughter went to a local Kentucky Fried Chicken and ordered a Taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'

He said he was sorry, but they only had Iceberg Lettuce.

From South Oxhey , Hertfordshire.

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,

'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'

To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'

He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

Happened at Luton Airport

The traffic light on the corner buzzes when the lights turn red and it is safe to cross the road.

I was crossing with an intellectually challenged friend of mine.

She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.

I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.

Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She is a Local County Council employee in Harrow , Middlesex. (And she's NOT blonde)

When my husband and I arrived at our local Ford dealer to pick up our car,

we were told the keys had been locked in it by mistake.

We went to the Service Department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's door.

As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door-handle and discovered that it was unlocked.

'Hey,' I announced to the Fitter/Mechanic, 'it’s open!'

His reply: 'I know. I already did that side.'

This was at the Ford dealership in St Albans , Hertfordshire.

They walk among us. AND THEY BREED!

Sunday, 4 November 2012

For Sale - Panavia Tornado F3 ADV Fighter Aircraft

Check this out chaps !  Link   Now if only I had room in my back garden...


Skilled Pilot Aborts Landing At Last Moment